A.S. Thorne

Life’s messy. Mine, especially.
Between the deadlines, the dreams, and the occasional existential meltdown, I’ve been doing my best to survive the chaos—and hold on to the things that matter.

This blog is new. You probably haven’t been here long. Maybe you stumbled in by accident—looking for something dark and moody and laced with just enough truth to sting.

If so: welcome. You’re in the right place. I’m A.S. Thorne, and I write about broken things that still burn. Girls with shadows in their mouths. Magic that costs something. Grief, trauma, sisterhood, survival. The messy stuff.

But today’s post isn’t a haunting new story or a carefully edited excerpt.

Today’s post is this: Life has been a lot.

You know what’s funny? (Not like ha-ha funny—more like scream-into-a-pillow funny.) I started this blog to connect, to create, to offer something raw and real. But lately? Life has body-checked me into a corner and stolen my writing time like it owes it money.

Between working full-time (which, let’s be honest, is way more than 40 hours), barely surviving grad school, editing The Mirror Between Us, and hurling my soul into the query void while praying it doesn’t catch fire—I’m fried. Crispy. Served with a side of “No, I can’t hang out this weekend, I have two papers due, I’m on call, and an existential crisis scheduled for noon.”

I’ve been running on caffeine, anxiety, and vibes. And while I’d love to say I’ve been cranking out brilliant blog content on top of all that… I haven’t.

Sure, I could try to spin this into some sweet, soul-searching post about balance or grace or whatever—but I’m not going to lie to you.

I’m overwhelmed. I feel behind. I feel like I’m not doing enough. (Even though my calendar looks like it lost a fight with a paper shredder.) I could try to dress that up, make it sound poetic or purposeful. But I won’t.

The truth? I’ve been burned out. Like I’m watching my dreams from the backseat of a car I no longer have the energy to drive. That inner voice—the one that hisses “you’re not keeping up,” “you should be doing more,” “you’re not a real writer if you’re not writing every day”—yeah, she’s loud.

But lately? I’ve been learning to raise an eyebrow right back and say, “Okay? And?”

Because here’s what I do know:

I’m still here.
I’m still writing.
I’m still fighting for the story that won’t let go of me.

And that counts—even when the progress feels less like a lightning strike and more like a slow, smoldering burn.

So no, I haven’t abandoned this blog. I’ve just had to shelf it while I survive a season that’s been asking for everything and then some. But I’ll be back. Not with some perfectly polished, Pinterest-worthy comeback post—but with something raw. Something real. Something me.

If you’re still here—whether you’ve followed from the start (hi, babe) or just landed in this little corner of the internet—thank you.

Your time, your curiosity, your belief in me… it matters. Especially on the days I can’t quite muster it for myself.

This blog isn’t dead. It’s just simmering. Gathering heat beneath the surface. And when I come back, the words won’t just return—they’ll come with fire.

So hang tight. Keep the spark alive. And if you’re stumbling through your own chaos in the meantime, let this be your reminder:

You’re not behind.
You’re not broken.
You’re becoming—one messy, meaningful moment at a time.

And I’ll meet you on the other side.

– A.S. Thorne
(Professional overachiever. Recovering perfectionist. Author of emotionally devastating fiction who’s trying not to ghost her own blog.)